Aaron Rodgers in New York will be tremendous content

The agent of chaos is descending upon the city that never sleeps

It finally happened. Forty days after former-Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers appeared on Pat McAfee’s show and said he “intended” to play for the New York Jets in 2023, he officially will.

Talks between Green Bay and New York broke down earlier this month, but they heated right back up, because this deal is fully cooked and out of the oven, baby. Shake n’ bake, amiright? There are many football implications, but I’m going to talk about something more important: the content and gossip implications.

Because Aaron Rodgers paired up with the New York media is going to give sports fans some of the most volatile, bizarre soundbites and storylines we ever could have imagined.

I’ve said for a long time now that Rodgers is an agent of chaos. I don’t think that he has beliefs so much as he has counter-beliefs. He has an illuminati tattoo on his arm and Ayn Rand books in the background of his Zooms. He “misled” the public about being vaccinated and then admitted he did so…on Joe Rogan’s podcast. He believes in the power of crystals and in darkness retreats, but not in science. He questioned the outcome of the 2020 election, but later said Donald Trump is a loser? He “leans pro-life,” but believes abortion should always be legal.

There isn’t much of a solid through-line besides simply being contrary. Rodgers’ stances change year-to-year. He strikes me as a guy who throws wrenches in gears and gasoline on fires just because he can.

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A post shared by Aaron Rodgers (@aaronrodgers12)

Before I go further, let me caveat my claim about Rodgers and New York. There is a chance, however slim, that this man tries to stay as low-profile as possible. The last time the Packers sent a quarterback with dubious* politics to the Jets was in 2008, and Brett Favre was apparently worried about living in…a real city? Here’s an article I found from New York Mag at the time:

*Favre’s politics are allegedly much, much worse than dubious

“The quarterback, who played in Wisconsin for sixteen seasons, was said to be concerned about living in the crowded New York area, but the Daily News reported that Mangini emphasized the proximity of the new Jets training facility in Florham Park, New Jersey, to many rural living areas.”

I can’t stop laughing. Imagine Eric Mangini, the former Jets head coach, being like, “Look, Brett, I know you’ve been living in Middle-Of-Nowhere, Wisconsin** for a while, and that New York might seem big and scary. But boy, do I have a solution for you: New Jersey***.”

**No offense, Green Bay ***or New Jersey

So maybe Rodgers will also stay in “rural” New Jersey. Rurality would certainly give him a chance to reignite his 2019 love affair with Canadian tuxedos and cowboy hats.

It’s like if Next In Fashion did the costumes for Yellowstone (this caption is for maybe four people).

But I don’t think he’ll take the “go gentle into that good night” route. Instead, I think he will “rage, rage against the dying of the light.” (Isn’t that why you subscribed to my newsletter? To hear someone talk about sports while quoting Dylan Thomas?)

Rodgers seems to relish the spotlight. He either loves attention, or he hates it and then lashes out — the truth is probably somewhere in the middle. He goes on McAfee’s show once a week during the NFL season, which isn’t something he has to do. He’s visible by choice. Maybe you remember the time that Rodgers straight-up called ESPN’s Kevin Van Valkenberg because he thought KVV was writing a hit piece on him?

Why on earth would anyone think this man will remain silent when the tabloids inevitably tear him down?

“I want him to start dressing like he’s in a Margiela fashion show circa 2012. I want him to try to ‘do’ New York but miss the mark, because I can’t see any world in which he actually hits it”